Muffin Madness
by ayshariham
Summary: How far is Rukia willing to go for a muffin? A lil crack


"Two cappuccinos and two blueberry muffins to go, please."

Ichigo glanced down at Rukia eyeing the menu, as he gave the order. _Why she even bothered to look at it, he didn't know, she always ordered the same thing each morning._

A petite girl appeared behind the counter, handing him the coffees. "Sorry, sir, we only have one blueberry muffin. Erm, our next batch will be out in an hour. Would you like another kind?" she asked, looking apologetic.

Rukia widened her eyes slightly and rested them on the muffin. _This would not do_. She had a routine. She always ate a blueberry muffin and had her cappuccino before she left to kick Hollow-butt. She dreaded hearing that the café was out of muffins. _Surely…Surely, Ichigo would let her have the muffin._

Ichigo was frowning. He didn't have an obsessive routine like Rukia, but he really had an urge for blueberry muffins today. For the particular kind they sold here. It was delicious, the warm crumbs melting amidst the tangy taste. His watch reminded him that he had 15 minutes before work. _Oh well-_

"Choose something else, Ichigo", said Rukia, reaching for the muffin.

If he had any thoughts of giving her the muffin, they disappeared rapidly.

"Whoa, hold on!" he said, snatching it out of her reach. "Why do you get it? Didn't I just tell you how much I was _craving_ this muffin?"

She raised an eyebrow at his words, and tried to grab back the muffin. He had an advantage over her, he was a lot taller, and her stony expression told him she knew it. Unless she tried to beat him down, that muffin was going to remain in the air till they reached an agreement.

He slowly edged towards a table and sat down, placing the muffin in the center. Rukia followed, carrying the coffees.

"We could just halve it", Ichigo offered.

She shook her head swiftly. She wanted her muffin. _Whole. _It was calling out to her, its sweet aroma beckoning-

"A contest, then?" asked Ichigo, with a half grin.

She seemed to consider it. It was an all or nothing gamble, but that meant she had a chance at a whole muffin. She nodded.

"A drawing contest?" she asked, her head already full of rabbit-shaped blueberry muffins.

He let out a chuckle. "Are you sure? Your drawing skills are hor…not the best you know." he completed carefully.

She made a face. People just didn't understand her rabbits. They wouldn't know art if it slapped them in the face.

"A Who-gets-the-most-Hollows contest?" asked Ichigo, leaning back in his chair. "We could use that bait thing Ishida used."

"And invite another Menos? No, thank you" returned Rukia, sipping her coffee.

_She could just grab the muffin and run…_

"Ichigo, let's be mature adults and solve this issue. I deserve that muffin.", Rukia said, her hand creeping towards it.

Quick as flash, the muffin was back in Ichigo's hand. "Sorry, got it first", he said, winking at her.

She looked around furiously to find something to throw at him, and ended up hurling a sugar packet at him when she couldn't find anything better.

"Sure, that's real mature" said Ichigo, grinning. He had 5 minutes. _Time to put an end to this…_

"Alright, let me make a deal. I'll give you the whole muffin on a condition." he said, leaning forward.

Her eyes perked, she nodded. "The catch is…?"

"Kiss me. Here. In the café" he said, dropping his voice.

She looked horrified. _Got her_, thought Ichigo. He was well aware of her…_dislike_… of public displays of affections. She could put up a great act with that fake-schoolgirl character of hers, but drive her into a corner like this and she definitely quavered. He liked her strong personality, but it was always fun to see her losing her cool a little.

Rukia curled her fists to her sides. She knew he had the upper-hand. But it was him standing between her and her muffin. _She should just get it over with_, she thought, as she moved towards him. _If she was in Soul Society, she would have just chained him down with kidou._

When she reached down to kiss him, it was with such a passion, Ichigo was surprised. He wondered if he was directing love or anger down at him, but either way, it was working. He heard a whistle somewhere. When she let go, he leant in again to kiss her, but she put her hand between them, her cheeks flaming but mischief dancing in her eyes.

_As if she was going to lose to him…she wouldn't just kiss him, she would leave him wanting more…_

"I'm going to pay for the coffee, the muffin better be there when I get back." When she returned a minute later, she smiled at the table. Ichigo was gone, but her muffin sat on the center of the table. _Alright! She had done it, won back her deserved muffin…_

Just then a hand snatched up the muffin, and stuffed it into a large mouth. "Ah, Kuchiki-san", Ganju grunted. "Just the person I was looking for" he mumbled, spraying bits all over. He continued, unaware of the steely _you-are-dead _look Rukia was directing at him. "My sister wanted to-"

He never really got to finish his sentence.

* * *

"Whatever happened to him?" asked Inoue worriedly, as she healed Ganju.

"Got hit down by a muffin truck" replied Rukia with a straight face.

If Inoue heard the squeak in her voice, she pretended not to notice. Healing all of Ganju's 20 broken bones would take a bit of concentration…


End file.
